I believe it was Yogi Swami Satchidananda who said something to the extent of, “Enlightenment feels like space in the joints.” In my case recently, enlightenment has felt like space in my sinuses.
Last week my yoga practice transitioned from flowing and inverting to laying horizontal on my couch, feeling all of the congested feelings. I know that what we resist persists, but the overachiever in me was NOT having it, especially because I get antsy when I can’t move my body.
A few years ago I found myself venting to an Integrative Nutrition coworker about not being able to practice asana when I was recovering from a month-long case of what might have been pneumonia [fusion_builder_container hundred_percent=”yes” overflow=”visible”][fusion_builder_row][fusion_builder_column type=”1_1″ background_position=”left top” background_color=”” border_size=”” border_color=”” border_style=”solid” spacing=”yes” background_image=”” background_repeat=”no-repeat” padding=”” margin_top=”0px” margin_bottom=”0px” class=”” id=”” animation_type=”” animation_speed=”0.3″ animation_direction=”left” hide_on_mobile=”no” center_content=”no” min_height=”none”][I promise New York has been kind to me in other ways…]. I was beside myself with frustration, and she simply consoled, “Maybe THAT [feeling, resting, recharging my batteries] is your yoga right now.”
Partly due to the growing obsession with athleisure and wellness, we can tend to generalize a skewed perception of what we believe to be yoga: pretzel poses, tree-huggers blissed out in meditation, all the peace love and happiness all the time. This is not wrong, but it is a hugely small piece of the yoga pie.
Yoga at its essence is a practice of awareness to slow the churning monkey mind, and as a result maybe connect to the truest version of our Self. It is comprised of eight limbs, of which asana [physical practice/postures] is only one. Other limbs include breathwork and meditation. It is a steady process on the path to oneness, or union, not necessarily to be mastered but to continually come back home to.
With this in mind, you can imagine my defensive reaction [which practicing yoga has softened dramatically] when I landed in a conversation with a woman at the YogaJournal Conference last weekend about how she didn’t want to contort her body into those more involved poses we see in the media.
I would begin to offer my thoughts on this, and she would immediately defend her position in favor of pilates. I would try to explain how I think pilates is amazingly beneficial for practicing yoga and vice versa, and she would cut me off by saying her body “just doesn’t do that.”
Eventually I found space in the debate, stood swiftly on my tiny soapbox, and asked her if she felt that pilates or anything else she enjoyed doing [ballet, I learned at some point] connected her to herself. She said, “Yes, pilates does that!” I said, “THAT is yoga!” She said, “…. Ahhh, ok.” Then she walked away.
Did I get it through to her that yoga is more than rearranging our bodies [which can be a fun, challenging way to connect to our physical vessels]? Are you understanding now or have you already realized that yoga is a lifestyle, not limited to moving within the confined space of a mat?
Have I learned my damn lesson that I can still practice yoga even when I’m ripping through tissue boxes and curled up on the couch for a few days?
Whatever the answer, the important nugget I am trying to convey is that yoga can mean whatever we want it to mean if it provides a means of feeling more connected, blissed, at ease in times of dis-ease, a little less messy in our mind, or helping us look at our mess with a little less judgement.
Yoga is not meant to wipe out the past for a blissful present – it offers tools to work with the past, present and future in an honest, mindful way.
Sometimes the things we dislike the most [getting sick, losing someone, feeling shitty] is our best teacher. These can be the most transformative, powerful times to practice seeing and being with our Selves.
Yoga is the practice of being in the moment, even when the moment sucks. When we work on unlinking our Selves to our emotions and/in the moment, even if it takes some time and grieving and vulnerability, we are practicing yoga.
My week of congestion and unwelcome rest was not a get out of jail free card for mindfulness. Some days I meditated on the couch propped up by pillows, others I just stared at the ceiling with my hand on my chest going over how I felt in the moment and how I desired to feel after this bug eventually passed. Although I wish it consisted of flowy sweaty vinyasa, there I was, practicing yoga, boogers and all.
Life happens, and it’s not always desirable. The tools yoga provides might not “fix” us or the moment or whatever we want out of, but it will keep us present.
When we can be present with our Selves when we’re congested or feeling blue or totally neutral, we are offering our body the attention it deserves and craves. That’s what that blissed out post-asana face is saying: thanks for taking time to witness me in the moment, you’re doing a great fucking job, I love you unconditionally, I fully accept you/the moment/this life/this body. Whatever we want it to say.
How do you practice yoga, and how does it work for you?
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Photo above: wearing Hyde organic cotton yoga apparel at Lucent Yoga in Greenpoint, Brooklyn.[/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]
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