There’s a crack, a crack in everything / That’s how the light gets in.
Leonard Cohen
Even when armed with an arsenal of mindfulness and self-care tools, life can present it’s challenges and, as a result, can seriously challenge our equilibrium [case in point: 2020, trickling into 2021…].
Exploring mindfulness for my own mental health started by:
- acknowledging how past and present difficulties were blocking my receptivity for mind-body health, even though I was and am doing all of the mindful healthy things.
- feeling these feelings thoroughly – because bye-bye all forms of bypassing.
- learning how to utilize different self-care measures in ways that are unique to my needs – whether that means taking specific supplements, taking singing lessons, or taking time off social media.
My biggest takeaway and ongoing reminder has been that – like Dr. Teitelbaum once referenced and how To Be Magnetic reiterates – we can do all the wellness and mindfulness things until the cows come home, but if hidden subconscious beliefs from our past haven’t been processed [i.e. are still very active via our habits, relationships, and lifestyle choices], then it is not unlike pouring quality fuel into a damaged gas tank.
That being said – my efforts and experiments have certainly helped me to equalize what could have spiraled into much more dramatic turns had I not had the tools in my mind-body tool belt.
All of these beautiful ancient practices I’ve been studying and implementing into my life are truly unique to each individual, and can be harnessed in special ways that help to cultivate a sense of short or long-term harmony – whether that means stepping into service, taking a step back, or stepping back into your Self.
After a tremendously tough year on so many fronts, it is not only important, but I would argue absolutely imperative for the health of us as individuals and a collective that we pay attention to our physical immunity AND ALSO the resiliency of our mind.
But if we cannot necessarily meditate or intermittent fast our problems away, what else is a human to do?
My hope for you in reading this is that I might offer you at least a sense of what feels like a safe space to explore your own inner-workings and emotions. I will also share a few encouraging suggestions based on my studies and experience that might spark some ways in which you can better tend to and support your own mental health as it ebbs and flows.
The result can be a greater sense of overall equilibrium, a quicker and more natural bounce-back from challenging circumstances, and an undercurrent of compassion along the way. It’s worth a shot, no?
Disclaimer: I share my personal story not to provoke a pity-party [please save your energy – the world needs you], but to perhaps remind you that, if you are also feeling these feels, you are very much not alone, and you very much have the tools / resiliency / courage within you to support yourself as best you can. If and when you are having a tough time accessing these tools – that’s what I’m here for, too, alongside your trusted medical professionals.
As I mentioned – the past few weeks and years of monumental transitions would have been even heavier without the nourishing food / movements / mindfulness practices I have come to cherish.
Because of some very uncomfortable recurring health issues, however, I knew there were still blocks I was bypassing in order to protect myself [as we naturally do]. Old wounds will often manifest in the body in some way in order to show us that we need tending to, and although this can be physically painful, it is also an invitation to pay close attention.
For a while I have noticed in myself a toxic childhood patterning concerning worth, validity, and love-ability. The subconscious top-performer, straight-A student, God-fearing [or rather Hell-fearing / Heaven-hopeful] bébé Sash has been anxious to become less active because she knows she no longer vibes with current conscious / future Sash, but she’s not quite sure how to crack the code.
Similar to what EMDR or hypnotherapy practices with its patients – we can recite all the mindful mantras and appreciative affirmations all day long, but if our subconscious inner child is still processing an experience [i.e. I learned that I am not worthy unless I do X] that causes our current self not to believe what our conscious might know to be true [i.e. I am intrinsically worthy, period, end of sentence], then we’ll be on the hamster wheel until the past subconscious beliefs that block the current conscious beliefs are fully processed.
After years of spiritual study and practice, months of major self-reflection, and most recently a few rounds of EMDR therapy, I landed in a place of really needing to sit with the extreme discomfort of my false beliefs – which still subconsciously felt so true to me – in that out-of-body-experience way that guides you to where you need to be even if it hurts.
Apparently where I need to be for now is off the social media grid [I’ll be back…], and occasionally even the grid as a whole; to indefinitely disappear a bit to the outer world I was so used to performing for in order to reappear to my truest Self in some sense.
There is something in me that is feeling a need to sink into myself in a way that doesn’t rely on anyone or anything else except myself and my own truths; to embrace my excess of alone time [adios validation station]; to turn attention toward myself so that I can better show up for others in the long run; to notice when I distract myself from my feelings so I can actually feel them all – all the way through. [Can anyone relate?]
CliffsNotes: it is sucky and also transformative; no fun and also really necessary.
Below are 4 mindfulness tools that have created a space for me to process emotions and also self-soothe:
1. Get curious and inquire. Here are some personal questions and feelings my ego is learning to move through – both general and specific – even if my soul knows the answers:
- Can I be with this? [No wrong answer.]
- What does this / what do I most need right now? [No wrong answer.]
- What lingering feelings have I potentially protected myself from experiencing?
- Where and when in my life did I first learn my limiting subconscious belief[s]?
- Am I being selfish by taking this time for myself? [No.]
- Will I be forgotten if I take a temporary break from some activities / opportunities / projects / people? [No.]
- Do I / does the work I do matter? [Yes.]
- Does not working as much make me less worthy? [No.]
- Will this ever end tho? [Yes.]
- *I highly recommend consulting with a trusted trained professional – whether coach or therapist or doctor or teacher – for extra support in creating a safe space to explore your emotions and past experiences.
2. Embrace duality. This is similar to sukha / sthira – or ease / effort – in yogic philosophy. Here are some opposing forces that support my own process:
- welcoming tears and engaging in laughter [watch Schitt’s Creek for both]
- resting more than usual and moving my body less than usual – both depending on the day
- feeling hard feelings and feeling extreme gratitude
- processing shadows of the past and envisioning the desired future
- spiritual texts and non-self-betterment books
- mindful self-study and just-for-fun study [what a joy to learn ukulele + Italian]
- aligned work that makes me feel of service and the play that helps me step into my most authentic Self
- vegetables and chocolate
- doing the bare minimum and forgiving myself for not doing more
3. Move and breathe. Here are a few supportive yoga practices to get the blood and breath flowing in a gentle way, even if only for a few minutes:
- restorative flow
- slow flow
- soft flow with props
- bedtime flow
- stretching sequence
- beginner flow
- simple propped restorative postures [free]
- namaskar asanas / sun + moon salutations [free]
4. Be still and be with your Self. Here are some supportive meditation practices to help reconnect, recenter, and reboot [repeat]:
- working with grief
- wings of awareness
- sky meditation
- relieving stress + anxiety [free]
- connecting to nature [free]
- can I be with this? [free]
- breathing for calm [free]
- simple pranayama [free]
This has been a tremendously tough year and then some. I sincerely hope you are taking the self-care measures you need in order to secure any sense of momentary or prolonged equilibrium. Remember that each of us is an important piece of this intricate Divine puzzle we are all doing our best to put together.
Contact me for support in cultivating your own mental-health mindfulness tools – now featuring new insights from first-hand experience.
Read the newsletter for a cozy cherry porridge for a chilly spring day, Saturday yoga sessions, ways to support India, mindful living resources like Sakara’s Healthy Body Project with start-dates in May [plus 20% off], and good vibes.
How will you nurture your mental health today?
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